The days of rubbery vibrators brought out with sniggers at hen nights are defiantly over. Kick-started by the phenomenal sales of the Rampant Rabbit, which shot to fame after featuring in Sex and the City, sex toys are out and proud. Now they come with a designer pedigree too and are just as likely to be given as gifts between girlfriends, couples and even as wedding presents - the new scented candle, if you like.



Here's Jamil Moen from Kiki de Montparnasse, the upmarket American erotic emporium where Lindsay Lohan had a birthday party, waxing lyrical about ... a vibrator: ?It's beautiful, egg-shaped, lustrous and modern. The perfect balance of an organic shape with a graphic cheeky print.? The price? A hefty $135 (?95).

The Motif Vibe is just one of a new generation of expensive sex toys aimed at style-conscious women and men. ?They're small, they're classy, they feel nice - and they don't look out of place alongside an iPhone in a Burberry handbag,? Foux says. And, despite the recession, women and men are buying them in droves.

At Sh!, London's first sex shop for women, sales are up 35 per cent from last year, with luxury toys growing from 10 per cent of all sales in 2007 to 30 per cent last year. At Lelo, a Swedish firm, sales are up 200 per cent year-on-year. Sales of sex toys at Myla, the luxury British firm, increased 10 per cent this year and 30 per cent the year before and, at the American company Jimmyjane, famous for selling Kate Moss a $325 (?226) gold-plated vibrator, sales boomed by 35 per cent. These companies have spotted a gap in the market for female-friendly, luxury sex toys and lingerie, and television shows such as Sex and the City, Secret Diary of a Call Girl, Gossip Girl and Lipstick Jungle have empowered women to buy them.

Daniel Gestetner, the chief executive of Myla, recalls a dinner party last weekend. ?When I told one woman what I did she immediately told me she had bought one of our sex toys and loved it. It's amazing. I had never met her before and within five minutes she's telling me that she has bought a sex toy!?

There are even environmentally-friendly sex toys, with Livia Giuggioli, of the chic Eco store in London, selling feather tickle-sticks and wooden spanking rulers made by Coco de Mer, the upmarket sex shop.

Katherine Hoyle, the managing director of Sh!, recalls how things have changed since she opened her shop in London in 1992. ?At that time vibrators were flesh-coloured and phallic, bought in seedy sex shops by men for women. But now women are buying for themselves.? These women believe thatorgasms are their right , and if that means spending money on something that fits into their lifestyle, so be it. Rachel Morris, a psychotherapist and sex columnist for Cosmopolitan, says: ?Sex toys are one area where I want something well made and comfortable, as well as good looking. It's like having nice underwear; if you can produce something gorgeous and not tacky, it's a much nicer thing to bring out and use with a partner.?

The key word here is partner. Many women buy luxury sex toys to use themselves, but there is also a growing demand among couples to buy erotic gifts for each other to zing up their sex lives. Bettina Arndt, a sex therapist and writer, asked couples to keep notes about their sex lives for a year while she was researching her new book, The Sex Diaries. She discovered that vibrators no longer threatened men; that they have come to see them as helpful. ?Men realise that vibrators can be a little ally in what can be the rather difficult process of arousing a woman. ?

Ethan Imboden, the founder of Jimmyjane, has also seen a big increase in couples buying for each other. ?It's about the melting of the ice around sexuality.? He gets regular e-mails from men and women asking for advice on what to buy for their partner. With an impressive roster of clients, including Teri Hatcher, Dita Von Teese and Jessica Alba, he finds many are drawn to the most expensive products. ?People will contact us for wedding gifts and buy our little platinum vibrator with diamonds ($3,250) for the bride, and seven of the little gold-plated vibrators ($325) for the bridesmaids.?

Although Jimmyjane sells at upmarket stores such as Browns in London, it also sells many sex toys online because some women still find going into a shop embarrassing. Emily, 37, a film producer, prefers to buy online. ?I know I shouldn't be embarrassed, but I can't help it, I just feel shifty handing over my credit card to buy a sex toy.?

Sam Roddick, the owner of Coco de Mer, says that customers can spend two hours browsing. ?You don't shop for sex like you shop for other things. People are vulnerable, so we have created a sanctuary. It's not like you are buying a throwaway item from a supermarket.?

At the pricier end of the spectrum you wonder whether women aren't being seduced by clever marketing. First, they are told that their lives aren't complete without the designer handbag, then the 4in designer heels, and now they have been told that they have to spend hundreds on a designer sex toy as well? ?That sex toys have become part of fashion is a slightly worrying trend for me,? says Katherine Hoyle of Sh!. ?People can be quite vulnerable when it comes to their sexuality and really believe that something they buy will change their life.?

Suzi Godson, Weekend's sex columnist, believes that the advantages of sex toys - to single women and couples - are worth the outlay if they can afford it. ?The market used to be dominated by 12in, flesh-pink, realistically veined dildos that embarrassed women and intimidated men. The success of the Rabbit alerted manufacturers to the blindingly obvious: sex toys would be vastly improved if form followed function, rather than the other way around.?

She says that while cheaper sex toys work just as well, in a mature commercial market people will pay for aesthetics. ?For a woman who can afford it, a choice between a pink plastic ?adult novelty' that has been made from a cocktail of toxins in a Chinese factory and a hand-tooled 24-carat gold limited-edition Jimmyjane is a no-brainer.

She says that vibrators definitely help women to achieve orgasm more easily - 60 per cent of women use them regularly. And size, it seems, really doesn't matter. ?Men are much more accepting of luxury sex toys because they tend to be less threatening. The gold Jimmyjane is slimline and only 5.25in long!?