If you're undecided about the course of your life at this point or you want to change something in your life but find yourself hesitating. Don't panic.



What you're experiencing is understandable, and there is nothing wrong with you.

Prior to my turning 50 five years ago, I had promised myself not to become pensive and introspective. And yet, when the time came, I couldn't help it.

It was a rather difficult time for me at the time. 7 months earlier, my dear mother had passed away. I found myself giving support to my younger sister, who was having a tough time dealing with the loss. Being the oldest, I also had to make decisions regarding legal situations, personal assets and equities.

Since our mother had lived far away in another country, dealing with the ramifications of her death presented several challenges. Travelling and telephone expenses were just part of them.

Still reeling from my loss, I was finding my full time naturopathic and psychotherapy practice a struggle. By the time my 50th anniversary came around, I found myself doing a great deal of soul searching. Questions such as: where do I want to going from here, when and how do I want to change things, who do I want to become and which persons are really important to me at this point in my life, became my daily mantras.

As these questions bombarded me, I realized what was happening. I decided to take action in dealing with my troubled thoughts and feelings.

You may want to use the steps I took at the time, if they resonate with you. They've proven to be my life line.

1. Enumerate 3 strong points about yourself which you know to be a fact. I did this to help me consciously focus on my strengths. They also reminded me of how I had applied these strengths in the past to help others and attained my own inner balance.

When you remind yourself of your true strengths and gifts, you instantly dispel all doubts and uncertainties. You instil into your being a power of self recognition and appraisal. This has nothing to do with self aggrandisement. It's simply being accountable to yourself. Never wait for others to approve of you first. That would be selling yourself short. It also puts you at a disadvantage.

2. Find someone who understands and appreciates where you're now and what you're going through. With me it was my first cousin who lives in England. We've always been there for each other. When I felt I needed some extra support, I called and asked her if she had the time for me. And she did have the time.

The key to swiftly moving on, is enlisting the support of an empathic, caring someone to see you through this period. Remember that they may also have their plate full, so ask and be honest about what you need from them. Try not to encroach on their time.

3. Give yourself space and time to deal with your new feelings and emotions. Every physical body, male or female, alters and changes in their physiological and mental set up. Your body started changing right from day one when you were born and will continue to alter up till you draw your last breath. This is a fact.

This also means that these changes may take you by surprise. Particularly if you're not attuned to yourself. You may be overwhelmed by your emotions at times. Because at 50 due to various hormonal changes, your feelings can run riot. This is nothing to be unduly concerned about.

What I found to be helpful in dealing with my emotions was taking a brisk morning and evening walks outside. I got up in the morning and after drinking a glass or two glasses of still water, off I went for a half-hour brisk walk. Same thing in the evening after dinner. I also found that I required more sleep than before. Drinking plenty of water is essential for keeping your emotions balanced and your energy up.

4. Take good care of yourself by catering to your body's needs. I've always been shocked by people who eat just about anything without as much of a thought about what it does to their body. Your body is your haven entrusted to your charge and you need to treasure it. Provided you want it to serve you faithfully for as long as you live.

My own commitment to my body goes without saying. I learned at a very early age how easy it is to ruin your health and how painfully difficult it is to get it back. This was one reason for my becoming a naturopath doctor and working as one with a dedicated vengeance for 20 solid years!

At this time, your body requires more nutrients. Eat well and supplement your nutrition with good vitamins and essentials minerals. You may also feel that you require some professional help. If you do get it.

Sometimes, you may feel guily about not pulling your wieght around as you feel you should. Know what? It doesn't matter. Let go of that guilt and just do what feels right for you at the moment.

In conclusion, remember that at 50, a number of physiological and mental changes are taking place in your body. These may cause some doubts and wariness, but in time you'll be off to a great new beginning.