Once with a group of women, we were discussing why it is that some children who seem to “have it all" are pleasant and friendly while others become spoiled. After sharing our stories, we drew the conclusion that the difference rests in the attitude and teachings of the parents. Some children “expect" to have certain things, and they soon become spoiled and unwavering. Other children remain thankful and appreciative.
Think of adults you know that fit these descriptions. Whom do you know who has a chip on their shoulder or feels the world owes them something? Whom do you know who greets each discovery with appreciation? It is easy to guess who is happier and more fulfilled.
Developing a thankful attitude goes a long way toward developing a more resilient and appreciative self. Here are a few ideas for spreading the attitude of gratitude:
•Think about the whole process. When you receive anything, be it a child’s drawing or an expensive purchased gift, focus on how much time, effort, and thought went into the gift. Taking the time to realize how much work, caring, and thought a person has given you, is a wonderful way to deepen your appreciation of both the giver and the gift.
•Realize each day is a gift. There are so many things that we take for granted. Many times we don’t realize how much we actually take for granted until tragedy strikes. For example, I always enjoyed my brother and never imagined we would lose him at age 27. It wasn’t until after this tragedy that I learned each day and each moment we have is a precious gift. Don’t be wasteful or unappreciative of these moments.
•Lower your expectations. I knew a woman who felt that she had such a series of bad luck that the world surely owed her something. I couldn’t stand being around her; she complained about everything. If it rained, it seemed the sky was out to get her. When we quit expecting the world (or people) to give us things, we can become more focused on enjoying the gifts that do come our way.
Sarah Ban Breathnach in her best-selling book, Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, advocates the use of a gratitude journal. She cites this as “a tool that could change the quality of your life beyond belief." I completely agree. The premise of the gratitude journal is to record five things that you are grateful for each day. Some days you might have to be creative to find five. Other days you might have ten or twenty! Value the little things. Value the person who sincerely smiled and asked how you were at the grocery store checkout. Value the soft touch of a child’s hand on your shoulder. Value a new song that you hear on the radio.
Create your own gratitude journal and list five things that you are grateful for each evening. Notice how this deepens your appreciation for life and helps to maintain a positive outlook. You may also want to start a “Family Gratitude Journal" where each night you think of five things that you are grateful for as a family.
Understanding Attitudes And Predicting Social Behavior
It is your basic 'mind set', your outlook, how you view things ...
For example, people with different attitudes will view (perceive) the same situation from quite different perspectives. A particular situation will be seen as a problem by one person and an opportunity by another.
It is usually the person who sees that situation as an opportunity that will be able to think of a useful solution to correct the situation.
So, a positive attitude can see opportunities in a situation where a negative attitude will only see the problems and obstacles. This can apply to all aspects of life.
In business the difference between a positive attitude and a negative attitude can often mean the difference between success and failure. A positive attitude will transmit positive and friendly signals, where a negative attitude repels people. How often have you experienced this as a customer in a business and vowed never to go back again.
People with ingrained negative attitudes often view life and work as a 'struggle'. They have been conditioned by their family or other background to expect life to be a struggle: almost with a fatalistic resignation that 'things don't work out'.
So, a positive attitude can result in -
· Developing a plan (any plan, even a very simple plan) for
your life or business rather than staying in a rut, 'doing
what you've always done'.
· Seeing a problem situation as an opportunity to solve this
problem or create a new approach to doing something, rather
than allowing the problem to block you and your hopes of
achieving your goal.
Note that a positive attitude does not mean everything will go without a hitch. Working towards a goal or implementing a plan does require effort, but this is different to struggle which is effort laced with negative emotion.
Attitude Renewal
Change - and how it affects us.
Changes in life's circumstances can bring about profound changes in our attitudes to both ourselves and life in general. These can relate ...
· to our work and business
· to our colleagues and associates
· to friends and family
In an era of change, these changes can be as diverse as ...
· unemployment
· health
· upheaval to your personal or your business finances
· relationship and family problems
Personal and self-concept issues can arise, bringing about negative attitudes
· hair loss for men
· weight increase
· other personal disappointments
Attitude and Our Sub-Conscious Minds.
Constant exposure to outside negative influences eventually permeates our sub-conscious minds, for example
· endless bad news stories in the media
· lyrics espousing a very negative and defeatist outlook
in some music
· friends with a negative outlook
These issues highlight the power of our sub-conscious minds. The maxim: 'whatever you fill your head with, you become' shows how constant exposure to any influence penetrates through the conscious area of our minds into the sub-conscious area. This is where our beliefs and attitudes develop and are held.
Keeping Your Attitude Fresh.
So, when your attitude goes sour, what do you do ?
Strategically plan to insulate yourself against avoidable negative influences that will corrupt your attitudes. Use your intuition to warn you of negative situations and people - and avoid both.
If however, you are in a negative situation that is having a debilitating effect on your attitude, there are some practical things you can implement to limit the impact of these things on your attitudes.
· It's of great value to have someone with whom you can talk
things through.
· Physical (strenuous) activity can relieve stress caused by
negative situations.
· Hire a humorous movie. Laughter is a great restorer !
· A change in your environment. A weekend away can give you the
refreshment you crave.
If you go through your life with negative attitudes you will end up being one of those people who look back on their life with regrets.
Both Brook Noel & David Berghouse are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Brook Noel has sinced written about articles on various topics from Parenting, Self Improvement and Motivation and Parenting. Brook Noel’s newest book, The Change Your Life Challenge: A 70 Day Life Makeover Program for Women, has helped thousands of women to improve relationships, finances, home management, self-esteem, fitness, self-care, stress and depression you can visit the. Brook Noel's top article generates over 1600 views. to your Favourites.
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