What makes the Great great. They are willing to be different from those around them. Friends and family may tell you to give up or that you are trying too hard. They may suggest games that incite a sense of jealousy. Whatever the case may be, you must decide whose calling the shots. You have to live with the decisions and the actions that you make. Make sure that this is done to the best of your ability.
Direction comes a lot easier when you have a model of how you want to be. When I am not sure how to model myself as a great partner in a particular situation I like to ask the question, "How would the partner I'd like to be do the thing I want to do?" Often, I get an immediate answer and proceed from there. Where you are right now in life is the result of the kind of questions that you ask. Make sure that you ask questions that promote a positive direction not only for yourself but also especially for the future of your relationship. Another example is "What can I do to have a wonderful relationship?"
Greatness as a partner demands that you expand your ability to love. Growing a better relationship will be in direct proportion to your ability to love. Strive to consistently love in all that you do. Be consistent in love with the words that you speak and especially in the words that you do not speak. Love requires sacrifice. It means doing things that you do not feel like doing and listening to the same complaint over and over again. Partner focused relationships are synonymous with love. Only through these sacrifices of love will you ever achieve greatness.
Maturity takes time. Some skills are harder to learn than others. Keep this in mind as you are suffering with new concepts like listening techniques. Advancement comes through hard work. You would never go to your supervisor and say, "Give me a raise and I'll work harder." Instead, you would make sure that your performance is top notch and if it is, then you probably will not have to ask for the raise. Promotion will be inevitable. Always be willing to go the extra mile. Your partner deserves it.
Do not compare your efforts to those of others who complain. Those who whine and complain never achieve the mature levels of greatness. They end up divorced and alone. Fear will be your biggest obstacle on your path towards greatness. Fear creates countless reasons why you should forget you ever thought about being a Great partner. Perhaps you could save yourself the embarrassment of failure and rejection if you just pretend that you have never heard the difference between good partners and great ones. Maybe you could blend in with the others who exist in a dead end relationship. It is normal to doubt your ability to transform into a great partner but do not surrender to this fear. It is a lie. I have transformed. I have seen hundreds of men and women transform. You can too!
