You do not understand how it is you being lost in the mechanics of trying to be something that is not true of who you are, that is creating your own reflection in life; that you furthering out and away from this "you" that is already true of you, is what has you hankering for other "out there" extravaganzas to distract you from the daily and momentary round of pain and dissatisfaction that you keep on feeling the frustration of.

You keep on wishing for, looking for, something from outside of yourself to relieve you of it all. Someone comes along and offers you "golden balls" that is going to magically dissolve you of the very thing that you get up to without awareness; that you keep on actively trying to do, which obviously does not work for you. You can certainly receive "siddhi" - spiritual juice or power - from outside of yourself but this cannot relieve you of your own daily activity of trying to be something that is not true of who "you" are.

You can attempt to meditate and try to go inside who you think you are and hope for some revelation to come along that is going to relieve you of your own pain, but alas, this is not going to do it for you either. Internally "out there" or externally "out there" is not going to have you standing freely in the reality of who you already are - which is the free standing one of all time that is already flowing through the eyes of this mindbody that you have so mistakenly identified yourself as being.

Going within is a poetical expression for finding the "you" of you which is already free of all arisings, even as they arise. Going within means the aligning of your conscious focus of attention to "that" which already is the happening thing right now - it is flowing through the eyes of who you think you are. It is flowing through this mindbody that you keep on unconsciously trying to be.

Without this "you" your mindbody would not even be; without your mindbody "you" would still be - you cannot get away from this "you" that you are, ever. Going within means finding who you already are and stopping at and as this one - your "areness", your "amness", your "youness;" that which is already flowing through this mindbody that you keep on thinking that you are and that you keep on trying to be.

It is this "motion of seeing" that is flowing through your very eyes right now - this very "you" that is flowing through and that you keep on failing to recognise. Recognise means to know again. You already know who you are but there has been a veil preventing you from realizing this "you" of you for so long now, that it appears that you cannot and are not capable of finding it.

This is no longer true for you. The dormant seed of this "you" has come to light - the veil has been rent - and you are now very capable of realizing this "you" of you if this is what you so wish to do.

Who you are is this "motion of aliveness" that is flowing through your eyes right now. Aligning your conscious focus of attention to this very "seeing" and coming to rest as this very "aliveness" will have you standing free of who you think you are.

It is through the practice of not furthering out from this one that is flowing through the eyes of this mindbody that you find yourself flowing through, that you begin walking the journey of self discovery of the heart of existence. It is through this finding and stopping at and as this "you" that the mindbody begins to unravel from its falsehood of being informed by the mind, freeing you to being the free standing one that already is here.