When I was a little girl, I have wonderful memories of her and my grandfather at the farm. I sat on the propane tank and acted like it was a horse, helped pick vegetables from their garden, collected eggs from the henhouse, and worked with my grandfather in his workshop. She had the most loving and even disposition of anyone I have ever known.

She would always send us letters when we were at camp, away at college or out in the world as grown adults. Each letter started with the weather, and ended with "take all mistakes for hugs and kisses". Her way of making sure we knew that she knew she had made many "mistakes" in her spelling or handwriting, but wanting it to be a positive.

Mistakes can be positives for all of us. I have discovered with my own children that they actually like it when I make mistakes. I think this is because it makes them feel like I am human too. After all, if they have to work on growing up, why should I be afraid to keep doing it also?

What is one of my children's (bio and step) favorite things to laugh about? Well, they have lots of things about me because I make so many mistakes! But the best one would be the time I blew up the potatoes in the microwave because I put in one-too-many zeros, and ran the timer for 1 hour instead of 10 minutes!

We all make mistakes in this life. We need to forgive ourselves and move on. Why? So we can teach our children how to forgive themselves when they make mistakes.

Another way to use your mistakes as a positive is to grow and learn how to do that particular thing better. Many times as I learn how to improve my stepfamily life, I immediately feel guilty because I wasn't doing it "right". But, you know, I was doing the best I could at the time.

Our ability to make mistakes, and then to show our children that we can learn to improve ourselves is one of the greatest gifts we give our children. It is our willingness to acknowledge to our children, "I am sorry I did that. I wish I could be perfect for you, but I can't. But I am learning new ways to grow and be a better person. Try to be a little patient with me, and I'll get better at this."

So go on out there and don't be afraid to make your mistakes, admit them to your kids, and grow from them for your kids. Your kids will love you for it. And you'll feel better too.