Usually when we suffer from bouts of uncontrolled anger, we know it. Being out of control can frighten us and those around us. We can learn how to deal with anger; understanding why we get angry and what makes us angry helps us to deal with it better.

If we struggle with anger management, we are not alone. One of five Americans has difficulty managing their anger. Those who cannot control their anger can cause scenes of rage that escalate into real physical conflict that damages property and even other people. Uncontrolled anger hurts everyone involved, even the person who is angry. Uncontrolled anger hurts people and things. It can affect our ability to function properly at work and, in extreme cases, lead to our dismissal.

Anger is normal. Everyone from time to time becomes angry. Anger can even protect us in times of danger. It can be healthy for us to feel angry about a situation in which we were abused, or ripped off, or mistreated. Expressing our feelings of anger at being treated poorly is healthy and normal. It is good to be able to vent occasionally.

When anger becomes unhealthy is when it destroys things and hurts our relationships with others. Uncontrolled anger is frightening to those around us, and even to ourselves as we seem unable to control our feelings. Anger creates fear in those who are victims of uncontrolled outbursts, and it alienates the aggressor from those who may have been willing to be supportive otherwise.

Anger is an emotion that can vary in intensity depending on what causes it. While we are angry, certain physical symptoms can occur. While angry a person's blood pressure may rise, their heart rate may increase and certain levels of stress hormones, including adrenaline and noradrenaline increase. These hormones stimulate us to action in a 'fight or flight' response: this is what allows a mother who witnesses who child being threatened to be able to have more strength than she normally has to combat a kidnapper, or other assailant.

Anger can be stimulated by internal or external sources. Some common triggers include: a coworker, supervisor, another driver, stalled traffic, a personal situation, memories, a traumatic event, or overhearing racial slurs.

Expressing anger is a natural instinct for when we are threatened or under attack. Being able to express anger can help save our lives when used in appropriate situations. Expressing anger in a violent manner, when other methods of dealing with a situation, event or person that is not threatening us directly is called uncontrolled anger. Situations that do not call for a physical response might be; like when someone cuts in front of us in line, or someone we pass in the hallway uses a racial slur not directed at us. These things may be unpleasant and we have the right to feel angry, but expressing our anger in physical ways that cause damage is not an appropriate reaction to an external, non-confrontational stimulus. It simply is not wise to respond by using violence or fly into a rage every time something displeases us.