We live in a rapidly changing world and one that we are having to constantly adapt to. The pace of change in all areas in the last 50 years has been phenomenal and we often struggle to keep up with all the new demands and developments we encounter every day.. People say they are stressed - and indeed they are - but what exactly does it mean? Stress is a condition that has many and varied symptoms, and your particular combination is unique to you.

The simplest definition of stress is that it is anything that makes you anxious, frustrated, unhappy, angry or tense. That's pretty wide, and in fact the word 'change' pretty much sums it up. When a situation, or a person or relationship is not what we are used to, or want, then that change stresses us, no matter how much we are able to rationalise it.

In fact it's how we cope with stress that is the key to managing it successfully. One person's stressor is just part of daily life to someone else. If you break out in a cold sweat at the thought of making a speech at your daughter's wedding that is hugely stressful to you, but to someone used to doing that most days of the week it's just part of their normal working life and certainly not a major stressor.

It is important to learn just what most stresses you so you can learn to deal with it because the consequence of not handling stress well is that your health can be seriously affected. .And I don't mean just your physical health either, because stress takes a heavy toll on your emotions and your mental state too.

Stress affects virtually all of us to some degree and although almost anything can make us feel stressed, but there are six key triggers that are common for most people:

Trigger 1:

Separation and loss are the biggest stressors. Whether that is losing your job, getting divorced or the death of someone close. Now you can't avoid these events in life, but you can learn how to deal with them to reduce the stress

Trigger 2:

Feeling powerless because you are stuck or frustrated and can't change the situation. Maybe you have been passed over for promotion or something minor like being late for an appointment because you missed your train or got stuck in traffic. You can't change the situation, but you can change your attitude to it and doing that will reduce the stress.

Trigger 3

Change on a major scale that we have to adapt to, such as going to a new school or job, or moving house. Any of these events puts us into an unknown situation and that can be scary as we have to learn to adapt to it, and that is stressful.

Trigger 4:

Unpredictability. We like the security of knowing what is going to happen to us so situations that are volatile such as changes in the economy, war and conflict, and the everyday challenges like company takeovers and taking exams, or any situation where change is inevitable but we cannot be sure of the outcome will be a stressor.

Trigger 5:

Conflict not unnaturally generates stress. We prefer to live in harmony with our family and colleagues and an ongoing dispute or feud generates long-term stress. We also have situations in our lives where we have conflicting demands, like wanting to write a novel and working 90 hours a week to pay the bills, or looking after a sick or elderly family member while running your own business or holding down a full time job. If we can't resolve those conflicts we will be living with stress.

Trigger 6

Emotional struggle when you are faced with doing something you know you either don't want to do or are uncomfortable with. This sets up an internal 'war' as you try to resolve your problem, whether it's doing work you hate or trying to fit in with your peer group who have different views and standards from your own.

Of course you can be subject to more than one trigger, but try to work out which is the one that is stressing you the most and see what small action you could take to start making a difference to that situation. Stress is not something to tackle all at once, but in small gradual steps that will make a real difference to how you cope with it.

Copyright (c) 2009 AnnA Rushton