It's a sorry state of affairs that divorced dads seem to get the short end of visitation rights. although, it may just be that their previous behavior earned them what they are now experiencing. And they might be deserving, but on the long haul, we have to focus on what's important and it's not their behavior - it's about what do the children need most - and that is to visit with both parents.

Unless a parent causes the child harm, he needs both of his parents. They need to know that they were not to blame for the divorce. They need to know that even if one parent is no longer living with the child, that parent still thinks about them, cares about them, and loves them.

The Courts awarded your right to visit your children during your divorce. Unless specified by the Court, one spouse does not have the right to overrule this Court decision without the Court's approval. If your ex is not adhering to the Court's ruling, go back to Court and get the details clarified. It is a right that both you and your kids share.

If your ex is withholding your right to visit your children, advise the police. Don't hesitate. If you wait, by the time you eventually do get back into Court, the judge will think you don't care. This is not about harming your ex: it's about your children and their right to have their mommy or daddy in their life.

If your ex is planning to move, advise your attorney immediately to take the required steps. Relocation is much easier to put a halt to before they move than after, so RUN to your attorney the moment this rears it's head. Your children deserve the continuity of both parent's presence and love.

Be considerate of grandparents and caregivers regarding visitation when you're getting a divorce. It's for the children, remember? They've formed bonds with these folks in their lives and they deserve to have that continue uninterrupted.

Here are some great points from www.findlaw.com about the best interests of the child for your information and advice.

What Factors Determine the Child's "Best Interest"?

Although the "best interest" standard can be hard to define in some situations, some factors are common in "best interest" analysis in most custody situations:

- Wishes of the child (if old enough to capably express a reasonable preference);

- Mental and physical health of the parents;

- Religion and/or cultural considerations;

- Need for continuation of stable home environment;

- Support from the family members of each parent;

- Interaction and interrelationship with other members of household;

- Adjustment to school and community;

- Age and sex of child;

- Parental use of excessive discipline or emotional abuse; and

- Evidence of parental drug, alcohol or sex abuse.

When you make visitation decisions, you should only decide that which aids the well-being of your children. They deserve to enjoy both their mom and their dad. Please make your decisions so that the welfare of your child's growing up years is happy, secure and stable? Do that. Anything else, avoid that.