Who are you? For whom are you writing a character reference? Why have you been chosen to write a character reference? Are there any limits or guidelines regarding what you will choose to write? Will it be the truth? Predictably the vast majority of us need to become better focused about things we choose to have in our lives. This is true for everything without exception, from what is useful to avoiding tricky and unpleasant emotions. The problem seems to be to do with how to achieve that clarity and then to find the solutions to questions. The 7 Words System offers a straightforward intuitive practice that makes it possible for us to get hold of a greatly improved sense of what it is that we are looking for. This starts with the word No. In the beginning we have to describe faithfully what we don't want, what is not useful, before we can know what we do want.

Writing character references and letters: HELLO is about attention, openness and exchange.

What aspects of the person you are writing about need to be brought to the attention of the reader? Are there specific characteristics about which you have been asked to comment? How open are you prepared to be about what you know and think? What's in this for you? What's in it for the reader? What's in it for the person for whom you are writing a character reference? The following step relates to the word Hello. We will need to make ourselves open to new ideas and people if we are to develop our scope of keys to the many difficulties that often arise for us. Is that reasonably logical? To get something new we will need to widen our horizons and look where we have not previously looked earlier. Novel ideas, new associates, new situations and new things are all parts of giving reflection to something we have not formerly come into contact with. We will want to trade old for new, that we have something to offer in reasonable return for what we want to obtain for ourselves.

Writing character references and letters: THANK YOU is about appreciating, valuing and giving.

What is it about the person for whom you are writing a reference that you particularly appreciate and value? Are these characteristics that the recipient will value? Is the person for whom you are writing a reference able to truly give without needing to receive in return - as you may be doing with the time you are spending writing the character reference? Habitually, we overlook the worth of what we have, fall into thanklessness and are likely to assume what should not be assumed. It's more than merely politeness to demonstrate our appreciation for things we esteem; it has an important part to play in helping us to succeed in attaining our aims. Unconsciously, we are pulled to what we communicate our thanks for, and yet it's equally valid to say that we can to magnetize them to us too. We build up our magnetism when we say Thanks and therefore, when we do so, we smoothly bring things to us. Among all existing options, some are more pleasing than others and we feel we want to treat them as having a greater worth, because we appreciate them more. This is explained by the primary word Thanks.

Writing character references and letters: GOODBYE is about realization, decision, completion, and moving on.

Is the person you are writing about decisive? Do they have courage to move in to the unknown? Can they quickly let go of the past? Are they good at tidying up before moving on? Goodbye is one of the seven primary words and relates to a process that has four stages. They are: realization, decision, completion and moving on. What we are saying goodbye to a possible stage of change, and so is distinguished in basic terms as absolute elimination of a possible path of action that we had been going towards and in future will not pursue. It is a crossroad point in our range of potential futures. Goodbye is different from No in that it means that we have had some kind of involved interaction already, which now needs to end contrasted with No's negation in the first place. True decisions cut the past away completely and that penetrating quality initiates an opening of a doorway that otherwise does not appear.

Writing character references and letters: PLEASE is about vision, intention and cooperation.

Is the person assertive? Are they good at choosing and asking for what they want? Are they more likely to take action than to grumble? Can they easily enlist the help of others?

The future opens out according to the habits of what has gone before unless we take control of it and bend it to our desire. This requires us to have a vision of how we want it to be; this vision has to be very clear, precise and positive transformed into intention. They differ don't they - vision and intention? The first is rather illusory and the second is much more motivated and controlled. For a vision to become real there must be help. Nothing can be done without securing the help of others - this takes skill, possibly arguments, even encouragement. It is not always compulsory to offer something such as money or money's worth.

Writing character references and letters: SORRY is about responsibility, remorse, repair and release.

In your opinion, is this person humble? Are they responsible? Are they able to 'forgive and forget'? When they cause harm do they do all they can to rectify matters? Sorry, the sixth word, is best seen as repairing harm done whenever we've been uncaring or unmindful to the needs or wants of someone else. The best plan is to make sure we prevent the need to say it by being considerate beforehand. Why on earth should we? Well it's because anyone we upset may well act against our better purposes and lower our chances of achievement of our goals, so it is simply more judicious to think about others as well as ourselves. It is all about being responsible, having some feelings towards someone whom we've upset and making recompense when we've slipped up. Only then is it feasible to prevent the likelihood or fix any resentment and release the permanent unpleasantness that otherwise would develop and rankle.