I have discovered that successful people tend to define failure as giving up. In other words, if they do not reach their goals, they did not fail, they do not feel like a failure, so they are not afraid of going for their goals. To them, as long as they keep working towards their goals and not giving up, they have not failed. So because of this, they are propelled to keep moving towards their goals all the time.

Wouldn't that be a better and more useful way to define failure to yourself? You know, you decide.

There was a lady who attended my seminars and she initially defined happiness as "everything must go my way". She felt that she was miserable every single day. She found it more useful later by redefining happiness as "as long as I do my best, I will be happy", and it was amazing because the minute she made that change and wrote it down, it seems as if a great burden was lifted from her. She started to glow and smile more and she even remarked that she felt lighter and more happy.

This is the power of a value change. Again, if rejection is an "away-from value" for you, you may also want to change what it means to you to feel rejected. If it was easy for you to feel rejected, then you would not take action for fear of getting rejection. You feel lousy. You may decide to feel rejected, that more than a hundred people may say "no" to you for example.

So if you did that, it would be really difficult for you to feel rejected, don't you think? Hence, you will be more driven to take more action in your life.

As I go out there and ask people to redesign their values, some people will ask me, they say, You know, if we can decide to change our values then why not choose to throw away all our "Away-from values".

If they create negative emotions and we want to avoid any way. You must understand that "Away-from values" again are very powerful in propelling us towards our goals. Remember what I told you about one of the insurance agents earlier on, that the reason was so motivated to succeed in life was because his number one "Towards-value" was success and accomplishment.

At the same time his number one "Away-from values" was being number two. He hated being number two and that propelled him towards his goals in life. For example, if your number one "Away-from value" was failure and you define failure as giving up, this will motivate you to never giving up, to push yourself towards your goals all the time.

If your "Away-from value" was boredom and procrastination, you hated to be bored and you hated to be procrastinating, would that be useful? Of course it would, because it would drive you to constantly do something, to constantly take action, start a new business, create new ideas.

See, one of the most powerful ways to design your values is such that you create both a pull effect and a push effect. You know, what I call a propulsion effect towards your goals.

So here are some possible ways you can design your values to create a propulsion effect. Can you imagine that along your "Towards-values", your number one "Towards-values" is success and you define success as moving towards your goals. See, that would cause you to be pulled towards reaching your goals, to take action towards your goal every single time.

At the same time, you may want to put your number one "Away-from value" as failure. Now if you say, "Would that be useful?" Yes, if you define failure as giving up. Because if you do that, then you will always move towards your goal and you will never give up.

And that creates a propulsion effect, does not it?

This is why redefining our values is such an important tool to make sure we empower ourselves to achieve our goals and not the other way round.