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Video on Helicopter Parents: Why Are Some Parents So Overprotective?

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Helicopter Parents: Why Are Some Parents So Overprotective?
Dr Robyn Silverman
It may not have been long ago that today's parents were whooping it up at college and celebrating their freedom and new found self reliance. But the party is over now. These overprotective parents have children now and they're keeping their eyes on them. Wherever their children are, these parents are nearby.
Most parents certainly mean well. They want the best for their children. It's clear that parents should get involved with their children's lives as a positive mentor, teacher, and guide. We all want parents to care about their children's success, emotional state, and progress. But sometimes, some Moms and Dads might do too much for their children. This can inhibit their children's ability to learn how to work and play independently.
A helicopter parent is one who hovers over their child and swoops in at any sign of discomfort or challenge. They are considered by most to be overprotective.
Parents can be overprotective for all different reasons. Here are a few:
1. Need for control: Parents can not control the terrorists. They have no control over the pedophiles or the kidnappers they read about in the paper. They can, however, control how their children spend their time and of course, with whom.
2.Bigger, Better, Faster: Since children are learning how to do most things, as this is what is developmentally appropriate, they are usually less skillful and not as quick as their parents at executing certain tasks. Therefore, it's not surprising for parents to feel that "It will be faster, bigger, bolder, and just plain better if I take charge."
3. Fear the failure: These Moms and Dads can not stand by and watch their child feel inadequate, unprepared, or miserable in any way. It is too heartbreaking. They feel it is their responsibility to protect their child from these negative feelings.
4. Desire to live vicariously: These Moms and Dads spend their time doing a large amount of their child's work and looking for acceptance and approval for their own performance. They get personally invested in every aspect of every activity their child engages in and take it to heart when their child fails.
5. Entitlement: These parents are constantly checking to see how you are treating their child in comparison to others. They keep their eyes on everyone else's plate. They believe that their child should get more of your time, additional energy from your staff, and lots of free "extras." If it will help their child, they will ask for it.
6. Need to keep them young: Some parents don't like the idea of their children growing up. When children are dependent on their parents, parents can feel needed and wanted.
It takes a very patient, secure parent to allow their children to employ self reliance. Children who are self reliant are confident in their own skills and therefore, are more apt to go after their dreams.
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