I spoke with one lady who said she was really fussy about certain things. The main thing with her was the shoes a guy wears. Now I would never have guessed this one, but she says that if a guys shoes aren’t up to scratch then it is a big turn off. Luckily enough I knew about this before I met her.



My shoes are not usually well polished. In fact I wear sneakers a great deal of the time. Therefore, when speaking to a potential date on the phone, you might like to slip in a question such as “How do you like your guys dressed? Casual? Smart?"

Hygiene

Have a bath or shower before you go out! Sure, I don’t need to tell you this but let me remind you just in case! Clean your teeth!

Appear as smart as you can with your personal hygiene and look clean.

Money, Looks and Power

Certain traits attract women. It is the law of the jungle out there and there is a pecking order. Some people have inherent natural advantages such as exceptionally good looks. Others have advantages that they have earned such as power or money. Let’s examine what women seek in these areas.

Money

Money, lots of it, is attractive to women. This is a generalisation as some women are far less influenced by money than others. Having said that, I know of several women who say, “Money isn’t important to me." Next minute they’re describing some really nice guy they’ve met adding the words “and he’s rich!" to the end of the conversation. Now if that isn’t proof positive of their interest in someone with money then I don’t know what else is.

But lets look at some recent research results. There were a group of males who were graded for their attractiveness. A photograph of each was taken and a fictitious job title attached to each. These photographs were then shown to a large sample of women who were asked to rate the physical attractiveness of each male. Next, each male had a different job title attached to his picture and they were rated for attractiveness again.

What the researchers found was that the males were rated as significantly more physically attractive when given a lucrative job title than when given a less lucrative job title. For example, a guy may get a 7/10 if labelled as a lawyer, yet only a 4/10 if they were told he was a janitor.

So how can we use this knowledge to our advantage?

Here’s how…

#1: Make your job title sound attractive – if you clear trash in the local park, tell them you “take care" of the local parks. As the research shows, the better the perception of your job title, the more physically attractive they will find you. If it is any consolation, I find this hard to believe but the researchers have done their work and uncovered this truth.

#2: Don’t talk about debts – your date just doesn’t need to know at this stage. There are plenty of other topics of conversation other than your mounting list of credit cards.

#3: Tell them you are ambitious or quite ambitious – women find ambition an attractive trait as it hints at security. Tell them you have no ambition and they’ll think as a couple you will always be struggling financially.

Looks

The beautiful people. The 10 out of 10’s. Those individuals who are blessed with exceptionally good looks. We all know who they are and luckily for them, they get the pick of the bunch – particularly the women.

But what about the rest of us? How can we find an attractive partner when faced with this kind of competition?

The good news is that with women, looks aren’t everything. Current research shows that men are much more likely to put looks first than women – with the exception of the stunning.

Researchers have found that stunning looking women are more likely to look for a stunning partner to help perpetuate their good looks from one generation to another. Whereas less attractive women are more likely to stress loyalty as the most important thing to them, as they want to keep a mate as long as possible.

Since the truly stunning are few and far between, this means the door is left wide open for us guys to find an attractive mate regardless of our looks. The mosaic of your personality has lots to offer and by putting your best side forward, you can attract a woman far above your natural pecking order in the looks department.

Power

Power is sexy. If you have it, then flaunt it because it is a proven persuader. History is littered with examples of powerful men being magnets for the opposite sex. It gives a person the aura of having qualities that perhaps they might not possess, such is the lure of this sought after possession.

Money can give you power. So can looks. But there are other and they all have an effect.

Here are the main types of power:

Money

This has already been discussed and it can be one of the strongest.

Authoritarian

Who hasn’t heard of a woman being attracted to a man in uniform? Yes, uniforms do look smart but then so do other forms of dress.

One subconscious reason for the allure of uniform is its implied authority. Police officers, the army, doctors and other uniformed men have authority over others in certain situations. A police officer can be in control on the street as a doctor can be in the hospital. Each has power in their own domain, but not necessarily any outside of it.

This type of power is contextual. In other words, you can only exert its influence when you are dressed appropriately in that context.

To use authoritarian power, you need to get your date or potential girlfriend to meet you under the circumstances where you have tangible indication of having this power. An example would be for your date to meet you at the hospital while you are wearing your doctors white coat. Then just say, “I’m sorry but I’m running a bit late. Can you hang on while I get changed?"

This may seem a bit far-fetched but your date will always have the image of you in your work situation. They may fantasise about you at work, if they like that particular image of you in uniform.

I wouldn’t suggest you go out of your way to engineer this kind of meeting, but if the situation arises and it doesn’t take much more effort, go for it.

Knowledge

You can impress with knowledge as it gives you the impression of being a fountain of wisdom. It makes you seem more worldly wise, intelligent and interesting. Women find this attractive, but will quickly be turned off if you come across as a know it all. Be humble and understated, but do let them know how much you know when the situation calls for it.

For example, if your date says, “Have you been to France?" then you can let them know that not only did you go to France, but you also have studied the language, like their food and so on. Don’t lie or embellish your story. Just be sincere. Self-promote your way into their mind. It will leave a favourable impression.

I remember going back to a girl’s place on a date some years back. She had a picture on the wall that I recognised as Leonardo da Vinci’s. By a stroke of luck, I had read a magazine article all about the man that very week. I knew nothing about art but I reeled off fact after fact about the man, how he studied the use of shadow in his paintings and that he used to be a comedian amongst other things. She was amazed! I went up in her estimation ten fold and she kept on about how nice it was to meet someone so cultured!

I avoided talking about art from then on or she would have known I knew practically nothing about the subject. Let me just say that my date went very well that night!

Looks

This has already been discussed.

Physical

If you are stronger than another guy or person, you have physical power over them. In today’s society, you cannot coerce anyone physically. However, it can be intimidating if you are physically much stronger than another guy. But when it comes to dating, you have to engineer the situation before you can exert your physical prowess as a dating advantage.

The circumstances where you may prevail would be where you are required to use this strength, such as down the beech playing ball, in the gym or helping out around the house doing tasks that require strength. Your advantages are then more apparent and you may be admired for your physical abilities.