There are two possibilities in every moment. The first possibility is to have all of our attention, curiosity and passion focused on what is happening. The other possibility is to focus that same curiosity, attention, and passion on what isn't happening, what is not present, or what want to be happening. The question is: In this moment, what are you giving your attention to? Are you allowing what is, or trying to change it in some way?



When we focus is on what is, our experience naturally opens up and becomes fuller, richer, and more complete. But when we focus on what is not (like the past, the future, or any idea about what would be better), our experience of what is happening narrows and contracts. In addition, inherent in a focus on what is not is a struggle with what is.

We discover that much of the time we are oriented toward what is not and in opposition to what is. Life can be mostly about how to make our experience better and have more pleasure, and how to avoid the things that are painful. We evaluate our experience to see what's wrong with this moment and how it could be improved. We ask ourselves what could be added to it to make it better. As a result, our attention becomes very narrow and our awareness very limited as we focus on our own thoughts about the moment instead of the moment itself.

Once we see how much time we spend struggling with what is, the tendency is to go to battle with that-to try to fix that. We think the solution is to fix this tendency to try to change everything. But that only changes the content of our struggle: Now we are struggling with our tendency to try to change things. We suffer over the fact that we are suffering.

Another possibility is to notice how you suffer, without trying to change anything about it. Just allow that you don't allow much. Recognize that that is the way it is. This struggling is what we were conditioned to do; and this it turns out that this conditioning is also a part of what is.

Once we take a break form being in opposition to what is, it becomes possible to see how our struggling comes from the idea of a "me". Without the basic assumption that something is happening in "my" experience, there is no point in trying to change anything. Our struggle and effort to change what is makes sense only if there is a me. It is in service to maintaining the idea or image of a me. In fact, the struggle is what makes up the me. When the struggle stops, there is no me. All of our suffering is the means by which we maintain an identity.

Once we realize this, the tendency is to try to fix this-to try to change our belief about who we are. We focus on getting rid of identification, which is again, focusing on what is not. We are still suffering because now we are at war with our tendency to identify. Instead of being oriented toward and accepting of what is (our struggle with identification), we are oriented toward how we think it should be: I should know better than to be caught in identification; I should know who I really am.

Another possibility is always available: to simply be present to everything including the tendency to identify, without trying in any way to change anything. If something is happening, then that's what is.Let it be just the way it is. it is all amazing, even the fact that there seems to be a "me". You may see how ultimately unreal this "me" is, but that does not mean there is any need to struggle with it. Why assume that ther is anything wrong that needs to be fixed? Without any effort or struggle, this moment is enough to enjoy. What a gift to be here!

When it is completely ok for things to be just the way they are,l including our identity, then naturally more of experience can be included in our awareness. If we just be present to and allow our identification and struggle, then it is also possible to notice something beyond all of that. We can call that Being.

So along with the struggle and suffering inherent in identification, is a much larger ground of Being in which everything is allowed. Our identity is just a thought or idea, but there is no need to judge or turn away from that idea. In addition to the struggling inherent in our identification, there is also present a profoundly rich ocean of Being, which is allows everything, including the "me". The struggle is only a tiny bit of our entire experience and even this struggle is allowed in the limitless presence of Being.

When we are allowing, we include in our awareness what it is that is allowing, and that is Being-which is who we really are. This realization can be a very jolting experience or a very quiet one because Being is actually very familiar. Every moment of allowing has actually been a moment of experiencing Being.

Paradoxically, what brings us beyond the struggle and unlocks the bigger view is realizing how much we enjoy identifying. Once we allow things to be the way they are, it is possible to admit that identification has been a lot of fun. The illusion of a separate self is an incredible act of creation. It has created the whole drama of human existence. It has inspired many of the great works of art and literature. We love to identify, but that doesn't mean we also don't suffer from it. This creation and projecting of a false identity-a me-is not a mistake. It's natural, spontaneous, and inherent in human nature. It's one of the richest parts of our experience-and there is also the even richer possibility of no longer mistaking the me as the totality of who we are. Identification isn't a mistake, and yet there is much more to life-and to us-than that experience. The larger Being that we truly are is always here.