We'll book this tour, it'll be oh, oh, oh so good   We're gonna steal your guarantee, shit      Oh, steer clear, we're on a wicked path   We've got plans, wicked plans   It's the least we can do   'Cause we gotta get ours somehow      It would be too easy making 10% off   The tours we book for you   So we figure we'll take as much as we can   'Cause it's not up to you      The music the bands provide brings the kids   To the shows but you know we just don't care   There are a lot of other bands we can use   If you don't want this tour      The point is even though everyone knows   We treat the bands like shit   And nobody has the guts to speak out   'Cause they're afraid that they won't get   The tours at the end of the day      You fucking kids have gotta learn the golden rules   You gotta use who you can on your way to the middle   You only give a favor for a favor in return   You get burned if you turn the other cheek      We don't believe you kids are so naive   To think that things could change   'Cause nothing ever changes in the real world   We're gonna drive that message home   'Cause money fills the gas tank in your van      Oh, steer clear, we're on a wicked path   We've got plans, wicked plans   It's the least we can do