There's a voice on the phone   Who just called in to say   "Mr. Jones isn't home   He'll be gone for the day"      So he pulls down the blind   To adjust his disguise   But it's all in his mind   Which he proudly denies      I turn the boat back from the weir   Where to go from here   I can't hide from each face I see   Looking out from behind them is me      I'm attempting to guess   What they meant when they said   "Mr. Jones and his guest   Won't be using the bed"      So if I take the rap   While they stay out of sight   I can spring from the trap   When the timing is right      One minute I think I know what I mean   The next I hear voices inside disagree   Why are they laughing at me?      So I pick up the phone   Someone's asking of me   Is the real Mister Jones   Mister One, Two or Three?      So I say that they're not   But it's not as I say   'Cos they're all that I've got   And I can't get away      As Alice waves us through the glass   Are we home at last   For tomorrow they'll be here you see   Locked away safe inside there with me      'Cos tomorrow they'll be here you'll see   Locked away safe inside they're with me      One minute I think I know what I mean   The next I hear voices inside disagree   Why are they laughing at me?