- written by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller  I took my troubles down to Madame Ruth  You know that gypsy with the gold-capped tooth  She's got a pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine  Sellin' little bottles of Love Potion Number Nine  I told her that I was a flop with chics  I've been this way since 1956  She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign  She said "What you need is Love Potion Number Nine"  She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink  She said "I'm gonna make it up right here in the sink"  It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink  I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink  I didn't know if it was day or night  I started kissin' everything in sight  But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine  He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine  ------ guitar solo ------  I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink  I didn't know if it was day or night  I started kissin' everything in sight  But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine  He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine  Love Potion Number Nine  Love Potion Number Nine  Love Potion Number Nine