Gonna buy me a steel umbrella  'Cause things ain't going too well  I go to bed thinking I'm in heaven  When I wake up I'm in hell  Take my dog for his morning walk  Shit am I glad he can't talk  Sooner or later it all comes back to me  You can bet on this  If it can happen  It'll happen to me (It'll happen to me)  Every time it happens  Why does it happen to me  Gonna buy me some more insurance  This asphalt surfin's getting to me  Accidents are an everyday occurrence  If there's a God, He's laughing at me  Might as well be the invisible man  See my footprints sinkin' in the quicksand  Sooner or later it all comes back to me  Bet on this  If it can happen (It'll happen to me)  Bet on this, if it can happen  Everytime it happens  Why does it happen to me  Bet on this  If it can happen (Buy me a steel umbrella)  It'll happen to me  Bet on this (No doubt in my mind)