You're always up to no good  Your finger's in my cookie jar  You can have my checkbook visa and my mastercard too  Ain't no price too high for what you do    You could be my dog  I could post your bailbonds when cash was tight  We could fall in love  I could be the apple of your eye    Let's do it right now    My new favorite thing to do  Is wastin' my time on a bum like you  My new favorite thing to do  Is wastin' my time on a bum like you    Your car's a dump and you're broke  but that's all right  I never liked them fancy guys  You don't even look good, god it ain't right  but you're starry eyed and out of sight    You could fall apart  I would post your bailbonds when cash was tight  We could fall in love  I could be the apple of your eye    Let's do it right now    My new favorite thing to do  Is wastin' my time on a bum like you  My new favorite thing to do  Is wastin' my time on you    You're always up to no good  you catch on like a bonfire  Every single worn out line is shiny and new  I never met a sweeter liar    You could be my king  I would knit you mittens and make you pie  We could fall in love  I could be the apple of your eye    Take the vcr  Take the keys to my house  the keys to my car  I don't need it no more  Cause you gave me the keys to your heart