Vampires, mummies, and the holy ghost   By: jimmy buffett, roger guth, jim mayer, peter mayer   1994   --spoken:   "ohhhh rock 'n roll is a scary business. no hit records, no mtv   Videos...you'll never make it here...scary. not! let's do it   Coral reefers...      Looked in my laptop, what did I see?    A flashin' message says today therapy   Rather walk through fire than converse with my shrink   But I'm getting better that's what some people think      Talk about denial and dysfunctional things   Head's like a bell somedays it dongs and it dings   My brain play tricks on me it likes to shift gears   Spend lots of money, but I'm tacklin' my fears      Chorus:   Vampires, mummies and the holy ghost   These are the things that terrify me the most   No aliens, psychopaths or mtv hosts   Scare me like vampires, mummies and the holy ghost   Ooohh      Had a dream last night took a time travellin' ride   Back to my childhood where those monsters reside   They nack on innocence and dine on self-esteem   But I like to be in touch with what makes me scream      Chorus:   Vampires, mummies and the holy ghost   These are the things that terrify me the most   No aliens, psychopaths or mtv host   Scares me like vampires, mummies and the holy ghost      I was never ever frightened by the murderer on our block   He nurtured orchids and raised hamsters   The neighborhood is still in shock      La la la la, la la la la....   La la la la, la la la la la la      La la la la, la la la la....   La la la la, la la la la la la      So many dragons lurking out in the fog   So many crazy people mumblin' monologues   It's not the tales of stephen king that I've read   I need protection from the things in my head   Like...      Chorus:   Vampires, mummies and the holy ghost   These are the things that terrify me the most   No aliens, psychopath or mtv host   Scares me like vampires, mummies and the holy ghost      Chorus:   Vampires, mummies and the holy ghost   These are the things that terrify me the most   No aliens, psychopath or mtv host   Scares me like vampires, mummies and the holy ghost      --spoken:   "ohhhhhoooohoooo. it's scary out here in the world of rock n'   Roll. ohooohoo. ahh haa haa haa haah, ah haa haa haaah. ahh   Haa haa, hegh achh ach.   Scared ya, didn't i? ha ha"