Seems like that man took my heart   [feels]   Laid it neatly out before him on the floor   Then he put on the biggest   Heaviest winter boots he had   And stomped on it for three hours,   Maybe four   And I hope his sorrells are ruined forever   Cause you know he knows how to push my every button      Get down to my last nerve      Like the other day he forgot to put his beer can   In the recycling bin   And he meant to do it on purpose I'm sure   So I might just have to tell him   Why his dog, ralph, that ran away three years ago   Won't be coming home again   Cause you know he walks around the house   In his underwear   Whenever my girlfriends come around   And perhaps if he were good looking   I might feel a bit jealous, overzealous   But all I feel is embarrassed   Looking at him standing there   And I hope he never finds his left slipper   And my psychiatrist says I should tell him how I feel   He says, "oh great, I gotta listen to her snivel again"   So I have these little unfulfilled fantasies   Of putting arsenic in his teacup   We'd see who'd be laughing then   If only he was the type to drink tea   Now I hear him come up the driveway   In his el camino   With it's black with a red-flame firebird on front   He keeps the keys to himself   He won't take me out to the movies   Cause of football   So I'll just hold out on something else   I'll never cook him another single hungry man tv dinner again   I say, "listen man, you better treat me with some   R-e-s-p-e-c-t   Cause I gotta a whole lotta what you need   Then a whole lot besides, and then still a whole lot more"      He said, "yeah, if you were talking about your weight   That might be true - but otherwise all you give me is   Headache and heartburn"   So I took his hungry man tv dinner and his sorrels   So I took his left slipper and his hungry man tv dinner   And I spit on his sorrels as I walked out the door.      And I spit on him as I walked out the door   By the way, your dog ralph won't be coming home again