Pull up my pants   Now the camera crew has gone   In your statement to the police   Tell them how you turned me on      But you were such an ugly child   You were such an awkward child   When you were such a stupid child   We should've cottoned on      Alan is a cowboy killer      Take up tai chi   Now your favorite pet has died   We had crazy fucking times   Till her visa card expired      But you were such an ugly child   You were such an awkward child   When you were such a stupid child   We should've cottoned on      Alan is a cowboy killer      Wipe up his mess   Pay your fluffers by the yard   How you're paying for your peace   How you're paying for your peace      But you were such an ugly child   You were such an awkward child   When you were such a stupid child   We should've cottoned on      That Alan is a cowboy killer   That Alan is a cowboy killer   That Alan is a cowboy killer      Alan is a cowboy killer