Now I was down upon my luck   And the jobs were hard to find   I was sort of short on cash   And my bills were way behind      So I went to see my life long friend   An old man now by trade   I figured it's how he had help me out   With his fortune he had made      I said, ?Old pal, I need your help   I hate to be so bold   But remember when I saved your life   Down at the swimming hole      Now I'd like to ask a favor   If you can see your way   I'd like to have a little loan?   And then I heard him say      ?Excuse me total stranger   I can't seem to recall   Are you absolutely certain   That we've ever met at all?"      "I'd really like to help you out?   As he opened wide the door   ?So long total stranger   That I've never seen before?      Now once I had a girlfriend   Who really caught my eye   And when the wife was out of town   Well, I'd court her on the sly      We'd taken all the nightclubs   And honky tonk around   Join at all the parties   And really do the town      But then one night my wife came home   She must have smelled a rat   She looked around from place to place   And found where I was at      Well, there we were all cuddled up   I knew that I was dead   But before my wife could say a word   I jumped right up and said      ?She's just a total stranger   Who came in off the streets   The place is kinda crowded   So I offered her a seat"      "Now, I couldn't leave this lady   Just a standin' on the floor   She's just a total stranger   That I've never seen before?      My friend said let's go huntin'   I've got the gun and chills   The birds are really flyin'   And I think we'll do quite well      He killed a half a dozen   Then said, ?I supposed   I really ought to tell you   That the huntin' season's closed?      About that time he heard a noise   And he ducked behind a tree   He took the gun, shelled some birds   And gave them all to me      Up stepped the old game warden   And found me standing there   Before I had a chance to talk   I heard my friend declare      ?He's just a total stranger   And I was passing by   I saw this total stranger   Shoot those birds out of the sky?      ?It's a shame the way some people   The laws they do ignore   Like this total stranger   That I've never seen before?