[Singers:]   Here is the tale of a babysitting job,    the baby is something of a snob,      [Stewie:]   Oh, go fuck yourselves      [Singers:]   So listen very closely, and you'll find   that what they say is not the same as what's on their minds      [Haylie:]   Aren't you a cute little boy      [Haylie's Thoughts:]   look at that melon shaped head      [Stewie:]   Having you here is a joy      [Stewie's Thoughts:]   and in an hour you'll be dead      [Haylie:]   Sit on my knee      [Haylie's Thoughts:]   please don't go poo      [Stewie:]   Nice place to be      [Stewie's Thoughts:]   This one's for you      [Both:]   Babysitting is a bum deal      [Haylie:]   Why don't we watch Will & Grace      [Thought:]   Jesus, do I need a smoke      [Stewie:]   Jack puts a smile on my face      [Thought:]   oh, what a surprise, a gay joke      [Haylie:]   I like your house      [Thought:]   the ceiling has cracks      [Stewie:]   I like your blouse      [Thought:]   Miss TJ Maxx      [Both:]   Babysitting is a bum deal      [Singers:]   So they sat as time went by      [Haylie:]   slowly as time could go      [Singers:]   the baby blarred, and softly cursed      [Stewie:]   cause her lips, and her skirt, and her shoes,    and her hair made her look like a hoe      [Haylie:]   Time for your bottle my sweet      [Thought:]   This little brat smells like piss      [Stewie:]   alway's a succulent treat      [Thought:]   while I suck that, you suck this      [Haylie:]   Aren't you a sight      [Thought:]   look at him drool      [Stewie:]   you're a delight      [Thought:]   Damn you, you fool      [Both:]   Babysitting is a bum deal      [Singers:]   The diaper change was quite a job      [Haylie:]   the grossest I've ever seen      [Singers:]   The baby smiled and took a breath      [Stewie:]   and I grunted and pooped out a poop,   that looked something like Matthew Modine      [Haylie:]   someday you might meet a girl      [Thought:]   yeah, she's gonna be your right hand      [Stewie:]   Maybe it's you my sweet pearl      [Thought:]   darling, i'd rather fuck sand      [Haylie:]   Have a good night      [Thought:]   you little creep      [Stewie:]   Have a good night      [Thought:]   Die in your sleep      [Both:]   Babysitting is a bum deal   Babysitting is a bum deal