He's done it all a million times   The gags, the repartee, the little crimes   Every audience is special and that goes for you   He looks into your eyes again   He never does it but he tries again   That old boy lost look could bruise you black and blue   Everybody's looking for a single row so they can be alone   Cos every time the lights go up, they'd rather be at home   I looked through all the wanted ads with a fine toothed comb   And all I came up with was another evening   Doing the same thing twice   That's what I was doing      All the drinks that he's been sinking   Never ask him what he's thinking   Every audience is unique and that goes for you   Dead or alive you're coming with me   Because everything's my cup of tea   That's why I've got a gold suit and some green italian shoes   Everybody says they had, but we all know they didn't   It's impossible to be a little bit pregnant   Give me the whole fruit cos I'm getting just a segment   And all I end up with is another evening   Doing the same thing twice      Well it hurts so bad to get this stoned   By ugly looking bureaucrats with ears like headphones   Reading the sun, sunday sport, s.ideal home, woman's own   Looks like you're on your own      Bring me on the magic sponge   My dying gasp, my final lunge   It's all over now bar the dance   Do it now but don't get caught   I've been having third thoughts   They can be so clever, only when the script demands   You cluttered up the sky now so you can't follow any star   Someone's sitting next to you in an empty cinema   No-one wants to end up face down in a reservoir   And I don't wanna end up with another evening   Saying the same thing twice