Up in the morning   Work like a dog   Is better than sitting   Like a bump on a log   Mind all your manners   Be quiet as a mouse   Some day you'll own a home   That's as big as a house      I know a fella   He eats like a horse   Knocks his old balls   Round the old golf course   You oughta see his wife   She's a cute little dish   She smokes like a chimney   And drinks like a fish      There's a big old goofy man   Dancing with a big old goofy girl   Ooh baby   It's a big old goofy world      Now elvis had a woman   With a head like a rock   I wished I had a woman   That made my knees knock   She'd sing like an angel   And eat like a bird   And if I wrote a song   She'd know ever single word      Kiss a little baby   Give the world a smile   If you take an inch   Give 'em back a mile   Cause if you lie like a rug   And you don't give a damn   You're never gonna be   As happy as a clam      So I'm sitting in a hotel   Trying to write a song   My head is just as empty   As the day is long   Why it's clear as a bell   I should have gone to school   I'd be wise as an owl   Stead of stubborn as a mule.