Well, the farmer prayed for a better year   And the crops were good like the Lord did hear   But his barn burned down with winter near   The answer came in white and black   In the farmer's almanac, it says   'If a man could have half his wishes he could double his trouble'      A sweet old lady was eighty-four   When her kinfolks came for a month or more   Now from overwork she's on the other shore   Much too late was y'all come back   And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'Visitors and fish smell after three days'      Our leader was a silver tongued man   He deceived the people of the land   And when he got caught he couldn't stand   It's a little off-beat and a little off-track   But it says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'In rivers and bad government the lightest things flow to the top'      Rod said, "I don't believe in God"   Rod died and lies beneath the sod   For God did not believe in Rod   Life is a troubled and a weary track   But it says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death'      The little boy followed the honeybee   And it flew straight to the honey tree   He got stung but got the honey free   Consolation for the things you lack   Is in the farmer's almanac, it says   'God gives us the darkness so we can see the stars'      He came home three hours late from work   Said, "I had a flat and fell in the dirt"   She said, "You gotten lipstick on your shirt"   Well it turned out like Jill and Jack   And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'Lies have to be covered up, truth can run around naked'      He said, "Honey, you know I'm true   I just look at other women that's all I do"   Then she caught him with her best friend Peggy Sue   Sometimes some women will look back   And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'There's a lot of difference in window shoppin' and shop liftin''      I sat down at a shoeshine stand   I had a real slow shoeshine man   I said you don't pop that rag like some of 'em can   He looked at me and then he sat right back   It says in the farmer's almanac, it says   'The trouble with the world today is   There's too much poppin' and not enough shinin''