We're a couple of swells    We stop at the best hotels    But we prefer the country far away from the city smells    We're a couple of sports    The pride of the tennis courts    In June, July and August we look cute when we're dressed in shorts    The Vanderbilts have asked us up for tea    We don't know how to get there, no siree    No, siree          We would drive up the Avenue, but we haven't got the price    We would skate up the Avenue, but there isn't any ice    We would ride on a bicycle, but we haven't got a bike    So we'll walk up the Avenue    Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue    And to walk up the Avenue's what we like          Wall Street bankers are we    With plenty of currency    We'd open up the safe but we forgot where we put the key    We're the favorite lads    Of girls in the picture ads    We'd like to tell you who we kissed last night but we can't be cads    The Vanderbilts are waiting at the club    But how are we to get there, that's the rub    That's the rub          We would sail up the Avenue, but we haven't got a yacht    We would drive up the Avenue, but the horse we had was shot    We would ride on a trolley car but we haven't got the fare    So we'll walk up the Avenue    Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue    Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue till we're there          We would swim up the Avenue but we haven't any lake    So we'll walk up the Avenue    Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue    Yes, a walk up the Avenue's what we'll take