Sitting on this barstool talking like a damn fool   Got the twelve o'clock news blues   And I've given up hope on the afternoon soaps   And a bottle of cold brew   Is it any wonder I'm not crazy? Is it any wonder I'm sane at all   Well I'm so tired of losing- I got nothing to do and all day to do it   I go out cruisin' but I've no place to go and all night to get there   Is it any wonder I'm not a criminal?   Is it any wonder I'm not in jail?   Is it any wonder I've got      Too much time on my hands, it's ticking away with my sanity   I've got too much time on my hands, it's hard to believe such a calamity   I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away from me   Too much time on my hands, too much time on my hands   Too much time on my hands      Well, I'm a jet fuel genius - I can solve the world's problems   Without even trying   I have dozens of friends and the fun never ends   That is, as long as I'm buying   Is it any wonder I'm not the president   (He's not the president)    Is it any wonder I'm null and void?   Is it any wonder I've got      Too much time on my hands, it's ticking away at my sanity   I've got too much time on my hands, it's hard to believe such a calamity   I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away from me   Too much time on my hands, too much time on my hands   Too much time on my hands