I'm driving down the highway   Headed to the range   Gonna knock 'em out stong   But I'm feeling no pain      Got an old brown bag   Big stick in the back   Where the grass don't grow   Gonna take a few hacks      There's a place for you if you're just like me   Armchair greens chillin at the TV   Have another cool one   but it won't hurt   Got myself a big stick   swingin in the dirt      Got a two bit job   with a little bit of pay   But I feel no pressure   Couple lessons today      Working on the swing   And talkin' trash   Take another good hit   Try to make it last      There's a place for you   If you're just like me   Armchair boys yelling at the TV   Twenty points in a row   I'm getting shirts   Got myself a big stick swingin' in the dirt      Bet a five dollar nasaw   And all you got's two   Well a five foot gimme   Make a man out of you      Well I got my dreams   And they just don't stop   Well a big man, big shot   Make her on top      Well, there's a place for you if you're just like me   Armchair greens chillin' at the TV   Have another cool one   But it won't hurt   Got myself a big stick   Swingin in the dirt      Repeat chorus