this space starts out empty  and i know it cant hurt more  than it already does    and it all falls down around me  and it hits me in the face  i fall onto the ground    and i wish that i could understand  why im so upset to see  these things ill never have    my hands shake with anger  but my eyes fill up with tears (taste like salt)  and its all your fault  till i can pick myself up off the ground    (groaning..)    to walk for miles  let the rain soak me until i smile  its getting late but i dont mind  im holding onto hands as drenched as mine  and for the first time in my life  i want to cry and laugh at the same time    because this is supposed to be happy  its supposed to be special.. special.. special.