the truth is i'm having a little trouble    deciding between the prize and money   and it's not like its any easier    with all these people hanging on my next word   in a look not made like this mood   i saw it clearly    but i didn't know it was you      once famous for leaving,   my small brained body    fell into the greatness of a bad joke   still meaning, in ruthless relevance   what i had meant to suddenly start knowing   they themselves don't have an excuse    for what they're doing   just to barely fill their own shoes    so if you notice    that i look like shit for a week    don't even worry   this is just how i wear my clothes    when i'm not   intrigued by first impressions   or swayed by cold rejections   my brain makes castles from sand    but i just do all i can