my girlfriend and i, we don't like the same movies   she likes romance and i like kung fu   she likes brad pitt, but i like Schwarzenegger   it's tv and beds in separate rooms   oh yeah i like Schwarzenegger   oh yeah she likes brad pitt      now i'm okay if i gotta watch the notebook   and madison county suits me fine   i sorta stayed awake through jerry maguire   but i'm sorry honey gotta draw the line   oh yeah madison county   oh yeah well, it's got clint eastwood   oh yeah jerry maguire   oh yeah show me the exit      we had to break up because i had to see titanic   a long freakin movie about some people on a boat   the film is actually longer than the sinking of the real one   only one good thing about it:   leonardo dicaprio dies      well, i don't really hate you, leonardo   i never even ever even really saw you on the screen   it's nothing personal, leonardo   but i'm not your demographic   you do best with female teens      i read in the papers how mr. leonardo   tried to sue some band for singing his name   publicity like that, it don't grow on apple trees   so if you're listening leonardo, won't you do me the same   and sue me   sue me leonardo   do me in the worst way   sue me   sue me leonardo   get my name in the papers   i'll be happy to pay      leo, hey buddy, is it okay to call you leo?   leo, won't you call me, won't you drop me a line?   come by my house, it don't matter if i'm busy   if you're bringing litigation, then i'll find you the time   to sue me   sue me leonardo   do me in the worst way   sue me   sue me leonardo   get my name in the papers   i'll be happy to pay      leo   leo, don't you hear me?   leo   don't you hate me?   don't pretend   leo   there's a court upon you, liar   sue me   for all i've got   and i'll be your best friend (i will be your best friend)   i'll be your best friend (i will be your best friend)   i'll be your best friend (i will be your best friend)   i'll be your best friend (i will be your best friend)   i'll be your best friend