stagecoach lady, hourglass body   making things glow in the night   well, she would if she could, and she'd be good if she would only   tell her lover she be out tonight   'cause I'm a bad   a lonely school boy   and I'm a rat   and it's too bad, can't get me none of that!   Salt Lake City, salt-lickin' bitties   bogus honey stinkin' of gin   well my daddy was hard, his face was pretty scarred   from kickin' ass and playin' poker to win   it's too bad   and it's too bad   can't get me none of that!   loose old lady   my mama Cady  chivalry was born at her feet   well she shoulda thought twice   when pa showed his dice   the night she put my daddy to sleep   It's too bad   Lord, it's too bad!