It was on the good ship Venus   By Christ, ya shoulda seen us   The figurehead was a whore in bed   And the mast, a mammoth penis      The captain of this lugger   He was a dirty bugger   He wasn't fit to shovel shit   From one place to another      Chorus:   Friggin' in the riggin'   Friggin' in the riggin'   Friggin' in the riggin'   There was fuck all else to do      The captain's name was Morgan   By Christ, he was a gorgon   Ten times a day he'd stop and play   With his fuckin' organ      The first mate's name was Cooper   By Christ he was a trooper.   He jerked and jerked until he worked   Himself into a stupor      Chorus      The second mate was Andy   By Christ, he had a dandy   Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock   For cumming in the brandy      The cabin boy was Flipper   He was a fuckin' nipper   He stuffed his ass with broken glass   And circumcised the skipper      Chorus      The Captain's wife was Mabel   To fuck she was not able   So the dirty shits, they nailed her tits   Across the barroom table      The Captain had a daughter   Who fell in deep sea water   And by her squeals we knew the eels   Had found 'er sexual quarters      Repeat Chorus to Fade