Jessica Fletcher and Lieutenant Columbo,   They couldn’t fathom out what’s wrong with you   Captain Hastings and Hercule Poirot   They couldn’t fathom out what’s wrong with you      You’re a murder mystery,   Of that there’s not doubt   Not even Quincy could figure you out   You’re a murder mystery   And you’re freaking me out.      Doctor Watson and Sherlock Holmes,   They couldn’t fathom out what’s wrong with you   Sergeant Lewis and Juliet Bravo   They couldn’t fathom out what’s wrong with you      You’re a murder mystery,   Of that there’s not doubt   Not even Quincy could figure you out   You’re a murder mystery   And you’re freaking me out.   Yeah, you’re freaking me out   Yeah, you’re freaking me out   Yeah, you’re freaking me out      You’re a devious swine   Of that there’s no doubt   You’ve a criminal mind,   But I’m working you out   Just give me more time!      You’re a murder mystery,   Of that there’s not doubt   Not even Quincy or the dog from Due South   You’re a murder mystery   And you’re freaking me out.   You’re a murder mystery   And you’re freaking me out.      Agatha Christie and Daphne du Maurier   They couldn’t fathom out what’s wrong with you   But I hope I do.