He was short, but he liked the ladies   He also liked the boys   He was a maybe   He made them proud   With the dimmer switch down   He was the guy I stole   All my ideas from      He wasn't shy, and he got by   Sung with a sigh   But he didn't have my guile      Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the books    That we're reading   Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the songs   That we're hearing      Well, the books that he read   Well, I skimmed them too fast   And I couldn't get past the language   He was a bit like me   But with much better teeth   He was the guy I stole all my ideas from      He lived near the coast   I'm not saying where   He might have the teeth   But, honey, he's losing his hair      Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the books    That we're reading   Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the songs   That we're hearing      I eat through the day   I've been putting on weight   It suits me they say, don't you reckon?   I should walk the dog more   But the dog ain't bored   She just eats here with me and we're happy      Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the books    That we're reading   Hey, hey, let's go stealing   Let's go thieving from the songs   That we're hearing