all of the places have been set   i'm so happy all you honoured guests all came   there's been planning and preparation    to put the normandy invasion to shame   this day is all for you   so now there's nothing left to do but      weep, bride, weep   weep, bride, weep   weep, bride, weep      weep, bride weep   now your girlhood is over and your womanhood lies stretched out before you   weep, bride, weep   like a dull grey matronly corpse on the coroner's slab   weep, bride, weep   nothing but the horrifying agony of childbirth for you to look forward to now   weep, bride, weep   while the melodies of yesterday's parties echo sadly in the past      la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride, weep      weep, bride, weep   now i'm sorry but it's time for me to talk about the subject of your husband   weep, bride, weep   i guess you think he's pretty 'cute' and pretty smart and maybe even pretty deep   well weep, bride weep   cos he's a closeted marxist who thinks that marriage is state prostitution   weep, bride, weep   so sometimes you'll have to fuck him just to get him to shut up and go to sleep      la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride, weep   la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride, weep      weep, bride, weep   but not too hard, we can't have you collapsing out of sheer desolation   weep, bride weep   because we need you functionally depressive so you'll still get up and drive the kids to class   weep, bride, weep   well at least tonight your father's buying all the liquid consolation   and the musicians will enjoy the bridesmaids in the ass      la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride weep      let's go now!   la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride, weep   la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da   weep, bride, weep