Saddening    I imagined the whole ordeal    I imagined the noises    And the pain that I feel    The landscape was far from    What I expected    But my eyes are still black and my    Skin blood red.       I did kill myself    Numerous times    And still I am dying    A death of my own design    But this time i am surrounded    By eyes full of tears    Weeping for the pain I've given    Many throughout the years.       This is my new hell    My heartless deeds paid off.       I've lost appreciation for love    There is no God who could change that now    I've been gone for years and I'm not coming back.       No longer can I offer you    The very thing that you want the most    I want to watch you cry as I walk away.       'Cause the old heart    That once stayed inside,    The one that loved you    Has long since died.       I no longer remember    The passions of the world    I've spent a lifetime chasing    Toward a heart-shaped void.       Now in darkness I rest myself    Away from human efforts    Beneath a mask of contentedness    Where I know that I am real.