Would you order on demand    From the disembodied hand    From the moving lights up in the sky?    'Cause there was a time you know    When I had my own live show    It was improvised for the camera's eye    It was made up in the ring    Back when Bob Hope was king    Back when every choice felt right    Back when life was black and white       Chorus: now there's one thing I regret    How I wish I didn't care    How I wish I could forget    That I was someone then when we were on the air       It was June of '55    I walked out when we were live    Cause I knew I was made for bigger screens than just    That small time comedy, just a half hour parody    It was cinema marquees for me or bust    We were heroes with a plan    Back before the laughs were canned    Back before the double bed    When the carpets all were red       Chorus       Maybe at the traffic light    When I see that big white sign    Just by chance in my rearview mirror    Well I don't know what it means    But I know it's not the screen    It's my own routine and I'm the antihero    But I used to be number one back before the reruns    Back when every choice felt right    Back when life was black and white       Chorus