did i not just do this?   i can't remember the first time   i climbed this stone helix   the last time i saw by a light   i see black so poorly   i only feel by the cold rail   direction, or motion;   or am i just standing still      now i'm falling back out over   all these steps that i've climbed   all these flaws that i thought i’d mastered   they've got me from behind      and i lay flat on my back, eyes upward   as drops of moonlight come raining in   and in that light, and in Your eyes, i find the strength to   climb these tower steps again      in the back of my mind   it seems they're coming again for   my mind and my spirit   as if i had them controlled   just as i see progress   it seems all steps look the same and   i'll never know how to   regain my insight again      dear God i surrender   these struggles that i can't command   and like a tiny child   let me walk by holding Your hand