--Christian Rock--   I woke up in the morning,   and I got myself some oatmeal,   and I put some raisins on it and,   Christ is God,   Christ is God,   God, God, God...      --Jewish Rock--   I woke up in the morning,   and I got myself some lox and bagels,   and I put some cream cheese on them and,   Christ isn't God,   he's just not God,   he's a really nice guy but don't get carried away...      --Atheist Rock--   I woke up in the morning,   and I got myself a whole box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch,   'cause I just don't care anymore,   and there is no God,   sorry about that,   your Grandma's in the ground and her soul's stayin' there...      --Agnostic Rock--   I woke up in the morning,   and I got myself some organic wheat puffs,   and I put some soy milk on them and,   there might be a God,   there's really no way to know,   he might be a fish or he might be a spoon...      All I wanted was a song about oatmeal.