Arnie works the cyclone at the state fair   Says he's in it for the chicks   Smokes about two packs of cigarettes each day   And he drinks just like a fish      Arnie never talks of family   And he never found a wife   He sleeps with the bearded lady   So does the guy that swallows knives      Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him   Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him   Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him -- I swear      Arnie talks as if someday he'll leave   if the right thing comes along   A distant dream as a mercenary marine   is a dream that's long gone      My eye, my eyes they're not like his    Maybe a little   God, I wish my eyes were just like his      Arnie's on the road eight months each year   Winters down south where it's warm   He's in a trailer park in Sarasota   Getting drunk with the clowns