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Evil's waiting on the thirteenth floor
But which was is up I don't know
And the seven trees of love
Have exploded all around me
And there's nothing left for anyone to see

But you can buy that at K-mart
It comes with screaming kids
And a wife with swinging arms
And there's seventeen reasons
That I can't explain, seventeen reasons
And I just keep wondering
Where's my silver needle novocaine

Love American style
With razor blades and whips and chains
And spiral Mary set up on a gauge
And if evil is waiting
Then it's waiting on every floor
But I can't just spend my whole life
Waiting always hoping for
And there's seventeen reasons
That I can't explain, seventeen reasons
And I just keep wondering
Where's my silver needle novocaine
Evil's waiting on the thirteenth floor   But which was is up I don't know   And the seven trees of love   Have exploded all around me   And there's nothing left for anyone to see      But you can buy that at K-mart   It comes with screaming kids   And a wife with swinging arms   And there's seventeen reasons   That I can't explain, seventeen reasons   And I just keep wondering   Where's my silver needle novocaine      Love American style   With razor blades and whips and chains   And spiral Mary set up on a gauge   And if evil is waiting   Then it's waiting on every floor   But I can't just spend my whole life   Waiting always hoping for   And there's seventeen reasons   That I can't explain, seventeen reasons   And I just keep wondering   Where's my silver needle novocaine