I can't believe I gotta stay here.   I think I'm going crazy   'Cause Uncle Vernon never stops with   The insults and the hazing.   And Little Dudders is a fat git   Who's always complaining.   And Aunt Petunia ain't no better.   She's what you'd call a hater.      Get your ticket for the Knight Bus.   And go for a ride.   Get your ticket for the Knight Bus   And say hello to Stan Shunpike.      Here I sit like an idiot,   Doing all the housework.   And what do I get for it?   I feel like a shop clerk.   Aunt Marge, she came over,   Man, what an ogre.   Talking trash about my family,   How could you blame me?      Get your ticket for the Knight Bus.   And go for a ride.   Get your ticket for the Knight Bus   And say hello to Stan Shunpike.      I can't wait to get to back to Hogwarts   And see all my friends.   'Cause I can't take anymore of this damn place.   So off I go.      Get your ticket for the Knight Bus.   And go for a ride.   Get your ticket for the Knight Bus   And say hello to Stan Shunpike.