(At the vacant lot. Joanne is reexamining the cable connections)      Mark:   And so into the abyss...The lot. Where a small stage is partially set up.      Joanne:   (playing with some wires)   "Line in"...   I went to Harvard for this?      Mark:   Close on Mark's nose dive.      Joanne:   "Line out"...      Mark:   Will he get out of here alive...?      (Joanne notices Mark approaching)      Joanne:   Mark?      Mark:   Hi.      Joanne:   I told her not to call you      Mark:   That's Maureen   But can I help since I'm here      Joanne:   I've hired an engineer ...      Mark:   Great!   Well, nice to have met you...      Joanne:   Wait!   She's three hours late   The samples won't delay   But the cable --      Mark:   There's another way   Say something -- anything      Joanne:   Test -- one, two three --      Mark:   Anything but that      Joanne:   This is weird      Mark:   It's weird      Joanne:   Very weird      Mark:   Fuckin' weird      Joanne:   I'm so mad   That I don't know what to do   Fighting with microphones   Freezing down to my bones   And to top it all off   I'm with you      Mark:   Feel like going insane?   Got a fire in your brain?   And you're thinking of drinking gasoline?      Joanne:   As a matter of fact --      Mark:   Honey, I know this act   It's called the 'Tango Maureen'   The Tango Maureen   It's a dark, dizzy merry-go-round   As she keeps you dangling      Joanne:   You're wrong      Mark:   Your heart she is mangling      Joanne:   It's different with me      Mark:   And you toss and you turn   'Cause her cold eyes can burn   Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound      Joanne:   I think I know what you mean      Both:   The Tango Maureen      Mark:   Has she ever pouted her lips   And called you 'Pookie'      Joanne:   Never!      Mark:   Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?      Joanne:   This is ... spooky   Did you swoon when she walked through the door?      Mark:   Every time -- so be cautious      Joanne:   Did she moon over other boys --?      Mark:   More than moon --      Joanne:   I'm getting nauseous   (They begin to dance, with Mark leading)      Mark:   Where'd you learn to tango?      Joanne:   With the French Ambassador's daughter in her dorm room at Miss Porter's. And you?      Mark:   With Nanette Himmelfarb, the Rabbi's daughter at the Scarsdale Jewish Community Center.      (They switch, and Joanne leads)      It's hard to do this backwards.      Joanne:   You should try it in heels!   She cheated      Mark:   She cheated      Joanne:   Maureen cheated      Mark:   Fuckin' cheated      Joanne:   I'm defeated   I should give up right now      Mark:   Gotta look on the bright side   With all of your might      Joanne:   I'd fall for her still anyhow      Both:   When you're dancing her dance   You don't stand a chance   Her grip of romance   Makes you fall      Mark:   So you think, "Might as well'      Joanne:   "Dance a tango to hell"      Both:   "At least I'll have tangoed at all"   The Tango Maureen   Gotta dance till your diva is through   You pretend to believe her   Cause in the end -- you can't leave her   But the end it will come   Still you have to play dumb   Till you're glum and you bum   And turn blue      Mark:   Why do we love when she's mean?      Joanne:   And she can be so obscene      Mark:   Try the mike      Joanne:   My Maureen (reverb: een, een, een..)      Mark:   Patched      Joanne:   Thanks      Mark:   You know -- I feel great now!      Joanne:   I feel lousy      (The pay phone rings. Joanne answers)   Honey, we're... (pause) Pookie?!    You never call me Pookie...    Forget it, we're patched.      (She hangs up, looks at MARK)      Both:   The Tango Maureen!