I wanna sacrific and sabotage   And not follow through   Like nothing's worth saving   If I can't have you   And there are dogs in my dreams   And pins in the seams   There are words in my hair   And you know what they mean      Last night shocked me and held me 'round tight   It stopped all my shaking and filled me with night   And it took me away, inside little grieving   And made me a pardon to giving you freedom      The muses have moved in with you   And I hope you sleep well   Open   When the dawn cracks up   You'll wake for her   And I am broken      I am all at once alone now   And it's glowing and surreal   See, my heart's small and smoky   This is all a thing we feel   And they loan me a photograph   Encoded in their language   Means to them I'm failing   And I'm giving up in anguish      You'd be satsified to see me   Head bowed and gray   Much weaker and stronger   It's me that they say   But I haven't given up on losing   I haven't given up the game   I haven't given up on waking   To the echo of your name      And I'd stop by the church tonight   But I'm not a believer   And I'd tell you the truth sometimes   But I am a better deceiver