a moment's time   is all you ever need   to choose fate      it's not a lie but a stronger truth   you know it's concise      don't give me that look of disgust   when you hold all of my distrust      another word from you   and i don't know what i'll do      your voice like screaming children   i worry where your body has been      it hasn't been with me   if you were me you would see      because if you are truthful i don't believe   that you are who i wear on my sleeve      i'm so tired      the blinding light can't even guide me      where am i?      the more dead the better      like a tree   dried and cracking   you think i'm laughing   i'm a wreck      and you're there to see   but there's not much underneath      you with me there was   and this wasn't just the drugs      you joke and i choke   because being here beside you      is like beating children in public   like breaking banks with toothpicks      but when the concrete is fresh   and i can step and not a sound      you'll hound   and somewhere somehow   i'll be found      so spend another worthless moment   trying to tell me what you need   but i still bleed      i'm a person not a machine      so give me fifty seven more tries   and every time i use one   part of me dies      because being with you now   is like slaughtering a cow      artistic and slow   but there's nothing much to show   but a fresh slice of flesh   that we're eating like the rest      it's nothing more than   something that was there before we began   it's nothing   it's nothing more than   something that was there before we began      and now i am trying   to keep myself from dying      because death is so illusive   it's somewhat intrusive   on how we can vaguely be   beneath the silent trees      when summer has hit us hard   and there's nothing in the yard      but vacant memories   clouded by bad judgement      and if i could destroy what i had lost   i would feel quite above it      so give me another mix   there's nothing that can fix the nicks   and cuts along my legs   from working hard all day      but you don't understand the truth   even when it's in front of you   and now it's so plain to see   that's why you can't be with me      pretend you're seventeen   like a movie star magazine      your eyes lie and so do your thighs   about who you want to be with   when you die      another night alone   i'm turning off my phone   in fear that you would call   and wake me from my steady fall   of self decline and waste   there is no need to haste      stumbling towards the door   i always knew you were a whore      sorry it's been fun now that you're gone   and there's no one that knows what i'm on      but maybe you could figure it out   if you took the time to hear my shouts         the warm blood feels fresh on my cold skin      i'd laugh in her face      the grass is always greener bitch      being alone gives a sense of   tranquility i haven't felt in   what feels like a lifetime      could this be a way for me to run from   the most painful personal experience      so pure it intimidates me