Oh my dearest Mr. Santa Claus   I am writing you because   There seems to be a problem with your staff   You may or may not be aware,   Or even worse you do not care --   At any rate, there is no cause to laugh   I gave it to my mother,   A specific list of toys to bring around   But when I woke up Christmas morn   It was an obvious clerical error that I found      If you look on page number twenty-two   Under the heading of “Rocket Packs”   There’s no way a personal jet-propulsion device   Could ever be confused with --   A BUNNY PUPPET??!!      Hello again, dear old Saint Nick   I really hate to be a stickler   But it’s clear from here that things must change   With software advances and the Internet   You really can’t delay in getting   Some elves that are more technically trained   I discussed this with my mother   Along with a list of toys to bring around   But when I woke up Christmas morn   It was a hideous clerical error that I found      If you look on page number twenty-nine   Under the heading of “Scuba Gear”   There’s no way a personal deep-water submarine   Could ever be confused with --   UNCLE WIGGLY??!!      Hi again, Saint Nicholas   I’m sorry that it’s come to this   But someone had to bring you up to speed   Perhaps your management skills are rusty   But you really have to trust me   You are just not meeting your customers’ needs   I was told by my mother   To let you know about this oversight   But I’ve been playing Uncle Wiggly with my bunny puppet   And I just haven’t had the time to write.