Funny Baseball Quotes

Funny Baseball Quotes

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nineinnings. Earl Wilson

When they start the game, they don't yell, "Work ball." Theysay, "Play ball." Willie Stargell, 1981

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty andgo back. Woody Allen

A baseball park is the one place where a man's wife doesn't mindhis getting excited over somebody else's curves. Brendan Francis

There have been only two geniuses in the world. Willie Mays andWillie Shakespeare. Tallulah Bankhead

Baseball is very big with my people. It figures. It's the onlyway we can get to shake a bat at a white man without starting ariot. Dick Gregory

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the WorldSeries? No cubs. Harry Caray

Confucius say: Baseball wrong - man with four balls cannot walk.Author Unknown

With the money I'm making, I should be playing two positions.Pete Rose, 1977

Andre Dawson has a bruised knee and is listed as day-to-day.Aren't we all? Vin Scully

Cricket is baseball on valium. Robin Williams

Finish last in your league and they call you Idiot. Finish lastin medical school and they call you Doctor. Abe Lemons

The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing. Dizzy Dean

I managed a team that was so bad we considered a 2-0 count onthe batter a rally. Rich Donnelly, minor league manager

Let no one accuse baseball of not being tough on drugs. Duringhis baseball career, Steve Howe was given 7 lifetimesuspensions. Bill Ferraro, baseball fan.

I could never play in New York. The first time I came into agame there, I got into the bullpen car and they told me to lockthe doors. Mike Flanagan, Baltimore Orioles

On his own scouting report: "Very deceptive. Slower than helooks. Joe Garagiola

A lot of things run through your head when you're going in torelieve in a tight spot. One of them was, 'Should I spike myself? Lefty Gomez

Three more saves and he ties John the Baptist. Hank Greenwald,on Bruce Sutter